"'Look at this beautiful kitten.' 'F--- you, that kitten's a socialist.' 'You're a f---.' Basically, that's the crux of all internet discussion." - Jeff Tweedy, Wilco, on web discourse.
"Their motto is: 'This ain't heavy; this is the psychological substitute for my brother the government didn't allow me to have.'" - Joel Stine, on why Chinese workers can lift more than Americans.
"No, because I drink in the evening and I don't want anything that I write at midnight to end my career...'You can kiss my ass,' all spelled wrong." George Clooney, on whether he follows Twitter.